Last night, I rubbed my sore eyes and realized I’d spent two hours scrolling through short videos on the sofa. It was already 11 pm, and the bloggers on the screen were sharing their lavish vacations, every frame seemingly glowing. Meanwhile, I stared at the unwashed coffee cup on the coffee table, feeling only a strange emptiness and anxiety.
I don’t know when it started, but after a tiring day at work, lying in bed scrolling through my phone has become my only form of entertainment. At that moment, I suddenly wanted to ask myself, in this era where even happiness can be mass-produced, are we really happier than before, watching others’ wonderful lives every day?
Why are more and more people feeling tired?
For today’s young people, the first thing they do every morning when they open their eyes is check their phones for various notifications. In our fast-paced online lifestyle, we are overwhelmed by endless scrolling short videos and fragmented information.
Sometimes, I just want to relax by scrolling through my phone for ten minutes before bed, but when I check the time, it’s already past midnight. Short video platforms keep coming, one after another, with something always funnier or more touching. Sometimes I open short videos thinking I’m resting, but end up feeling even more tired afterward.
One second you’re laughing out loud at a funny video, the next you might see news of your peers buying houses and cars. At a class reunion last month, a friend suddenly said, “I’m doing pretty well, but after seeing how my friends are doing, I always feel like I’m falling behind.”
My younger sister recently told me that she had deleted two social media apps from her phone. She said the first few days felt strange, but after a week she stopped comparing herself to people she barely knew. She said she didn’t feel “happier,” just less distracted.
The difference between virtual satisfaction and real satisfaction
Seeing the number of likes on my social media feed rise every day, or receiving a few words of praise from strangers in the comments section, makes me genuinely happy. But this positive feedback comes too easily; the other person might have just clicked casually. Praise is sweet, but what I remember most is always that one negative comment. A hundred compliments can’t erase that one “It’s nothing special.”
Sometimes I feel happy when I post a photo and receive a lot of likes, but this happiness usually doesn’t last long. But after I put my phone down, the room was still the same room, and that empty feeling didn’t disappear.
I had dinner with some colleagues the other day, and when we got to the end of the conversation, we found that what we envied most was not a raise, but that no one would contact us on the weekend.
I spent nearly three hours this afternoon making pasta from scratch. Halfway through, I realized I hadn’t checked my phone once. The kitchen was messy, and the sink was full of dishes, but I felt strangely relaxed. That feeling stayed with me much longer than any viral video ever did.
I remember wiping flour off my hands while thinking I should probably check my phone—but I didn’t.
How to reduce digital fatigue
Today, I left my phone at home and walked to a nearby market. At first I kept reaching into my pocket, only to remember there was nothing there. After about half an hour, that urge gradually disappeared.
I didn’t really change anything big. Lately I’ve been trying to stop using my phone an hour before bed, though I don’t always manage it.
Keep your phone in the living room and don’t bring it into the bedroom; this will significantly reduce the frequency of reaching for your phone in the middle of the night. At the same time, invest your energy in cultivating offline hobbies, such as exercising, cooking, or trying some crafts. Some people take baths, some do yoga, and some even use adult products.
I tried to break the habit of scrolling through my phone before bed. I told myself not to check my phone, but I still picked it up once without thinking.
The importance of returning to true feelings
A friend of mine once said that she bought adult products not because she was lonely, but because she was under too much work pressure and wanted to give herself some real time to relax.
In the past two years, I have often seen people sharing their experiences using Rose Toy on social media. Many people are initially attracted by its appearance, because it looks more like a decorative item than a traditional adult product. I’ve seen people mention it pretty casually online. Someone even said it felt more like buying skincare than anything else, like it wasn’t anything special.
Rediscover your own sense of relaxation
Tonight I did something: after dinner I locked my phone in a drawer and took it out two hours later.
For the first twenty minutes, I couldn’t resist reaching for it. Then I made myself a cup of tea and read a few dozen pages of a novel I’d been meaning to finish. Two hours later, when I checked my phone again, I hadn’t missed any important messages.
Before sleeping, I checked my phone one more time. It was mostly ads and random stuff, nothing that really needed my attention.
